I am hoping I can still escape its clutch. I am just a few auditions away from being the next Dristan Girl. Some girls are destined for Bond. I’m more cut out for Mucinex.
Aches.
Chills.
Headache.
Low energy.
Watery eyes.
Sore throat.
Have you noticed how all things cold and flu-related even sound gross?
Mucous
Nasal irrigation
Sinusitis
Phlegm
Snot
Wheeze
Rhinovirus
The medicines sound just as gross.
Mucinex
Tussionex
Nyquil
Pseudoephidrine
Guaifenesin
Delsym
Robitussin
Benzonatate
Afrin
Surely I can relieve this watery eyes, feverish chills, sore throat onset with something that is more tasty than terrible. I am a wimp when it comes to taking medicine. Most all cherry flavored liquid variety syrupy stuff makes me gag, dry heave, and then throw up a little. It’s not worth it. I’d rather feel like crap than taste the rusted metal dipped in yak urine flavor of anything that comes with its own dosage cup. I just had to seek out some better, tastier options.
Common Cold Tipple
1 cup chamomile tea
1 ounce of Absolut Mandrin vodka (I mean it’s orange, right?)
Few slices of fresh ginger
Few slices of orange peel
Honey
Few whole cloves
Wedge of orange
Steep ginger and orange peel in chamomile tea. Add vodka. Stir in honey to taste. Poke a few whole cloves into the peel side of the orange wedge and plop it in the tea. Sip. Breathe. Repeat. Sleep.